Dad O’Clock: Why a Whitefish Bay Dad Created Space to Connect

When Erik Moser organized the first Whitefish Bay Dads meetup at The ARGO, he genuinely had no idea what would happen.

“I told the venue maybe 5 to 10 people,” he said. “I didn’t know if anyone would show up.”

Instead, more than 30 dads filtered through in the first meet-up to talk parenting, work, sports, stress, community and life. Some stayed for hours. Others met neighbors for the first time despite living in Whitefish Bay for years.

For Erik, the turnout confirmed that a lot of dads are looking for connection, even if they don’t always know how to ask for it.

I sat down at Fitzy’s Cafe with him to talk about the inspiration behind Whitefish Bay Dads, mental health, building community as an adult and why sometimes the hardest thing is simply putting yourself out there.

“Here Goes Nothing”

“Welp here goes nothing lol”

That’s how Erik started his post in the Whitefish Bay Villagers Facebook group to call other dads to meet up for a 4 pm “Dad O’Clock” happy hour group at The ARGO.

“As we all know, it only gets harder with age to find opportunities for genuine networking with no strings attached or ulterior motives,” he wrote.

He was “absolutely blown away” by the results.

“People were texting me later that night saying guys were still hanging out at 7:30, 8:30 at night,” he said.

What struck him most wasn’t just the number of people who came, but the variety of dads who showed up.

“There were older dads, newer dads, aspiring dads, dads from outside the community,” he said. “People just wanted to see what this was.”

That openness was intentional from the start.

“It really was just: can we create a space where people can connect?” he said.

The event also highlighted something many parents quietly experience: making friends as an adult is hard.

“You kind of assume the window closes,” Erik said. “Maybe you missed your chance because you didn’t join a certain sports team, volunteer group or school activity at the right time. Then life gets busy and suddenly years go by.”

The meetup, he hopes, creates a new opening for people who may have felt disconnected.

Why He Started Whitefish Bay Dads

At the center of the idea is something Erik feels strongly about: men’s mental health.

“There’s a statistic I can’t stop thinking about,” he said. “A huge percentage of men are more depressed or anxious than they ever tell their spouse or the public.”

“As dads, we feel like we have to be strong for our wives and kids all the time. We’re not supposed to be sick. We’re not supposed to be struggling. And eventually that can wear on you.”

That doesn’t mean every meetup needs to become a therapy session.

“For the first event, I wasn’t trying to peel the onion back too aggressively,” he said. “I kept it lighthearted.”

Still, he intentionally included mental health statistics on flyers at the event, including information about depression and suicide rates among men.

“I wanted people to at least see that this is part of why we’re here,” he said.

Over time, he hopes the group can naturally evolve into something broader: a place where dads can talk about serious topics if they want to, but without pressure.

“In a perfect world,” he said, “maybe there are tables where guys are playing euchre, another area where people are talking sports and another where people want to have deeper conversations. It doesn’t have to be one-size-fits-all.”

A Wake-Up Call

Erik says the moment that finally pushed him to act came during a routine doctor’s appointment.

“My blood pressure was really high,” he said. “The second reading looked better, but seeing that first number shook me.”

Immediately, he thought about his kids.

“It made me think about relationships I had let drift, things I was holding onto, stress I wasn’t dealing with,” he said. “I had kind of a wake-up call.”

That moment sparked deeper reflection — not just about physical health, but emotional health and community as well.

“I realized there were changes I wanted to make,” he said. “Not just for me, but for my family and the people around me.”

Why Whitefish Bay?

Erik and his wife moved back to Wisconsin several years ago after living in places including Phoenix and Seattle.

Originally born in Rhode Island, Erik spent parts of his childhood in Madison, Tampa and elsewhere before eventually returning to Wisconsin. After college, he spent time living in Costa Rica, immersing himself in Spanish-speaking culture and learning how to connect with people far outside his comfort zone.

Those experiences shaped the way he thinks about relationships and community.

“When you move a lot, it can be hard to build long-term connections,” he said. “You adapt, but you also realize how important community really is.”

Whitefish Bay, he says, still has something special.

“You still see kids riding bikes here,” he said. “There’s a walkability and connectedness that’s rare now.”

But even in a close-knit community, he noticed something missing.

“I had been here for years and really only knew the neighbors immediately next to me,” he said. “And I started thinking — people can sometimes tell you more about celebrities or internet drama than they can about the people living two doors down.”

That realization became part of the motivation behind Whitefish Bay Dads.

“Regardless of politics or background, if you’re paying taxes here like me, let’s sit down, have a drink and talk about life.”

Learning to Put Himself Out There

For Erik, the willingness to create something from scratch did not come out of nowhere. He moved often throughout his childhood, with roots in Rhode Island, Madison, Tampa and eventually Wisconsin again.

Erik said the spirit to put himself out there came, in part, from his parents. He grew up in a biracial family, with a white father from Brookfield and a Black mother from Beloit. His mother attended UW-Madison and was the only Black student in her nursing class before graduating with honors. Next year, his parents will celebrate 50 years of marriage, a milestone Erik sees as especially meaningful.

“My parents, from a very young age, taught me to dare to be different and follow your heart,” Erik said.

After college, Erik spent five months in Costa Rica living with a host family. He did not speak Spanish when he arrived, and his host family did not speak English.

“It was sink or swim,” he said. “Within a month, I was dreaming in Spanish.”

Those experiences shaped the way he thinks about connection.

“When you’re put in situations where you have to figure it out, you learn how to adapt,” he said.

That background helped him take the leap with Whitefish Bay Dads.

“Putting myself out there is something I’ve always had to do,” Erik said. “One, being in sales, it’s the name of the game. But my childhood and everything definitely shaped who I am today.”

Building Something Inclusive

One thing Erik repeatedly emphasized is that he wants the group to feel open and welcoming.

“This isn’t just for dads of athletes or one social circle,” he said. “It’s for everybody.”

That includes dads with young kids, older kids, aspiring dads or people simply looking for community.

“You can have a beer, a non-alcoholic drink, talk sports, parenting, work, life — whatever,” he said. “The point is just getting people together.”

He also hopes the group reflects the broader diversity of experiences in the community.

Growing up in an interracial family and moving frequently helped shape that perspective.

“My parents always taught me to put myself out there and not be afraid to be different,” he said.

That mindset eventually led him to create the meetup even without knowing whether anyone would actually come.

Surprised by the Community Response

One unexpected moment from the first meetup was seeing Whitefish Bay Village President Kevin Buckley walk through the door.

“I had never actually met him before,” Erik said. “Like a lot of people, I mostly knew him through the Facebook page and community updates.”

But after talking with him, Erik came away impressed.

“He genuinely cares about the community,” he said. “There was no sense of personal gain. He just wanted to support something positive happening in Whitefish Bay.”

For Erik, the turnout overall reinforced the idea that people are hungry for more real-world connection.

“I think people are tired of just being keyboard warriors online,” he said. “There’s something different about sitting down face-to-face.”

What’s Next?

While Erik has plenty of ideas for future events — everything from casual meetups to potentially a dad talent show — he says he doesn’t want the project to become overly complicated.

“I’d actually love for other people to take the torch,” he said. “If this becomes something the community owns, then that’s the goal.”

He also hopes future gatherings continue helping people form connections that extend beyond a single event.

“Maybe you meet another dad with kids the same age. Maybe you find someone who shares a hobby. Maybe you just realize you’re not the only one feeling stressed or overwhelmed.”

In the end, the mission is pretty simple.

“Just getting people out from behind screens and talking to each other again,” he said.

And based on the response to the first meetup, it’s clear a lot of people were ready for exactly that.

Next Dads Happy Hour

Before wrapping up, Erik added one more detail that says a lot about his personality, and maybe why Dad O’Clock is hosted at the new music venue, The ARGO.

“My kids were named after Bob Marley and David Bowie,” Erik said. “That might be the most important thing.”

The momentum continues with Whitefish Bay Dads Happy Hour: Episode 2, hosted by Erik Moser.

The next gathering will take place on Wednesday, June 3, from 4–6 p.m. at The ARGO. This time, the group will be upstairs on the balcony in the main theatre, with tables, euchre decks and plenty of “dad logic” flowing throughout the evening.

The meetup is open to all dads and aspiring dads, whether you came to the first event or are simply looking for a low-pressure way to meet more people in the community.